It’s the word I chose as my anthem for this year: CAPABLE. I saw it printed on a friend’s necklace, and when asked about it, she responded that instead of writing out wordy resolutions & soon ignored goals for the new year, she had decided to choose just one word that would summarize the quality she most wanted to learn to exemplify, and the area in which she most wanted to grow. Just looking at the word gave me chills. Of course, that was it, that’s what I want to be! All my life I’ve felt weak and fragile, been labeled as such by people of influence. In various battles and experiences, I’ve found it to be true, in sickness and in health. Through an intense struggle with chronic pain and illness, I have learned boundaries that provide rest, but simultaneously felt sorrow in allowing the words “I can’t” to define me. My only appreciation of weakness stems from the dependence on the Lord it necessitates. I need Him every moment of the day, from the strength it takes to get out of bed and get moving, to working at jobs that are too much from me. There always seem to be complex relationships that need navigating and to-do lists that are never-ending. I’ve begged to be healed from the inside out, petitioned to be stronger and less-emotional, requested over and over again God would provide someone with whom I can share life’s journey. It seems I’m constantly waiting on His answer and relief, seemingly without answer.
But…He has answered, and assured me as He did the apostle Paul in II Corinthians 12:9: “My grace is sufficient for YOU, for MY power is made perfect in weakness.” He’s reminded me: “I can do ALL things through CHRIST who strengthens me” (Philippians 4:9), and that “His divine power Has given us EVERYTHING we need for life and godliness” (II Peter 1:3). The testimony of my life is not that I am capable, but that HE is. So this year, I’ve chosen my friend’s word to be my resolution as well. I want others to look at my life, even seeing  fragility and brokenness, and see I’ve found Him capable, am finding Him so anew each day. May they see His faithfulness in making my strength equal to the days He’s given me (Deuteronomy). Though the answers never come in the timing and ways I envision, He has provided and proved Himself enough over and over again. It’s true: He’s made me capable. “…We have this treasure in jars of clay, to SHOW that this ALL-surpassing power is from GOD, and NOT from us” (II Corinthians 4:7, all Scripture emphases mine).


2 thoughts on ““Capable…

  1. Your words inspire me to remember dependence is what makes me capable. It is a backwards concept in our culture and in many of our stories. When independence and strength (capability even apart from God) is what allowed you to survive, dependence can feel like death. Thank you for bringing truth to twisted beliefs.


  2. This is beautiful! And I believe it would resonate with a large audience. It also makes me think back to all of the times I allowed other people’s perspectives of me to define me, when we ARE capable. Thank you for sharing. I hope your new life is finding you happy and healthy and capable. 💕


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